I came across the top picture in my Facebook feed, and felt the need to modify it.
You’re welcome, Whovians.
I was going to write about how much I hate all of the news articles about digging up an empty space where Hoffa is supposed to be buried, but I decided the story of how my boss bought me socks was more fun.
This was at my old old job, the first full-time job I had right out of college. I was working at a small family-owned company, where there were literally four of us (and I was the only one not family), so it was really laid back. Like, jeans and tennis shoes with a cat in my lap laid back.
My boss had bought his wife (who worked with us) some boots for Christmas, and had them shipped to the office (because why not?). To make the order large enough for free shipping, he added a pair of men’s dress socks for himself. (Why he decided on dress socks, I will never know, since the man lives in bleach-splattered t-shirts and Birkenstocks.)
When the packaged arrived, he opened the box and went, “Why did I buy these? These are awful!” Not knowing what awful thing he had inadvertently bought, I turned around to find him holding an awesome pair of argyle socks!
Seriously, they’re fantastic.
Because I liked them so much, and because he would never dream of wearing argyle socks, my boss gave them to me.
Even though that relationship ended on a poor note (which is a whole other story), I still think of my boss and that job when I wear them. Which is a lot, because I only have about three pairs of work-appropriate socks now that I have to dress up every day.
Have you ever had one of those moments where you really need to talk to someone about something, but you don’t want to ruin it for them? Like, you already watched the next episode of a TV show, and something awesome happens that you want to discuss at length, but the person you want to talk to about it hasn’t seen that episode, so you just have to bite your lip, sit on your hands, and wait?
I’m in the middle of that, and it’s going to last for several months, I fear.
I’ve been reading the Game of Thrones series for the past few weeks, along with watching the show on HBO with my man-friend. I’m finally at the third book, which is the part of the story that the show is currently at, so I was racing against the show for a while to read what would happen next before the next episode. I succeeded, but now I wish I hadn’t.
I just read something so big in the book, that I just have to talk to my man-friend about it. Unfortunately, he has just started the series, so he hasn’t read that part yet. Even more unfortunately, the show is done for the season, and they did not do THE BIG THING. This means that I will have to wait for him to read all the way through to this book to talk about it, and until then, I have to keep my trap shut every time he says something kind of related to THE BIG THING.
It’s going to be a long summer.
Ever have one of those days where you start out just wishing everything would go away so you could go to sleep, and then something happens that just hypes you up so that you are able to get through the rest of the day with a pleasant smile on your face?
No? Just me?
Well, today was like that for me, and here’s the person responsible.
I was scrolling through my Facebook stalker feed today when I got to work (as I am wont to do), and this popped up.
I know it’s only the beginning of June, but I think this is the funniest thing I’ve seen all month. I seriously giggle every time I see this. It needs to be my background photo on my computer to look at when I’m having a bad day.
Apparently, Erica is going to a wedding today, and can only curl her hair with sponge rollers. Because her office (my former office) is really laid back, she decided to wear her curlers to work, looking like a housewife from one of the square states.
And it is awesome.
If you think that this picture is amazing (which it is, so don’t be afraid to admit it), you should check out the blog she started when she ran off to Vegas to get married. Seriously, she can spit out pop culture references like nobody’s business, and working with her was what kept me sane the last few months of that job.
High school, college, grad school, whatever – we generally find ourselves with a lot of extra time once school is not an in-your-face priority anymore. Here are some books to help you unwind a bit and remember why you loved reading in the first place.
1. In the Wilderness – Kim Barnes
A memoir of a girl growing up in a variety of places (many that include the actual wilderness, such as a logger’s camp), Barnes’ writing is just beautiful – it will make you remember why you loved to read in the first place. And the things that she remembers and the grown-up conversations that she deciphered as a child – amazing.
2. Boy Still Missing – John Searles
I discovered this book in high school, and still like to go back and reread it. The story follows a teenager in the 70’s who befriends his father’s pregnant mistress. Subdued hijinks ensue, along with coming of age things and a hostage situation.
The first of Augusten Burroughs’ memoirs, Running with Scissors follows his life as a ward of his mother’s psychiatrist and his strange family. The best part of this book is the humorous twist that Burroughs puts on events that would make any other person want to curl up in the bath tub and cry.
An interesting story for religious and non-religious folks alike, this short book follows a young woman who joins a nunnery and develops the stigmata, while the other nuns gossip and deny that she is telling the truth.
A great introduction to Margaret Atwood, Cat’s Eye follows a young woman as she flies through childhood and grows into adulthood. The beautiful language that Atwood uses makes this book just lovely to read. And no, the title is not about a cat, it’s about a marble (and oh, how literary analysts and professors love to interpret that).
If you ever want to feel better about your own strange childhood, read Jenny Lawson’s first memoir (and then check out her blog, because it’s awesome). From taxidermied animals to sticking your arm inside a cow’s vagina, your life will never be this strange.
People complain about Shakespeare being difficult to read and even worse to understand, but I guarantee it’s easier when you’re not being forced. Macbeth is a nice one to read because it is a very interesting story, full of witches and curses and prophecies and killing kings and blood all over the place. Seriously, it could be a modern movie, and everyone who didn’t know it was Shakespeare would love it.
This is definitely not one to read if you are buying a new house, but it’s worth the fears any other time in your life. This book follows a couple who find a strange opening in their home, and keeps even the most ADHD reader in check with spiraling text, footnotes, and lots of other strange stuff.
Stephen King is always great to read, because his stories are so interesting (except for Dreamcatcher. Even King will admit that he wrote that one while on an immense amount of painkillers). This one is post apocalyptic and mysterious, and also became a bad TV miniseries (I do not recommend). It may make the apocalypse seem too real, though, so beware.
Yeah, you probably had to read Tom Sawyer in high school, but honestly, I don’t know why that one is more popular. Huckleberry Finn has the better adventures, and more poignant tales than that guy. Check out this one.
This fictional story is actually based on a lot of things that happened in Dorothy Allison’s life, before she found the courage to speak about her white-trash family in a real sense. If you like her as an author, or just want to experiment with something new, I suggest also reading her memoirs, because they are flavorful and quick reads.
Everyone should know the original fairy tales – the gruesome, giving birth in your sleep, cutting off your heels kind of stories. Because life is not all fairy tales, and these versions will at least make you feel better about not fitting into your sister’s shoes.
I know I’ve talked about Outlander before, but I can’t help it – it’s an awesome series. It’s got Scottish people, time travel, true love, and lots of authentic history. Pick it up if you feel that you have an overabundance of time on your hands (like when you’re unemployed and living at home).
In true Palahniuk fashion, Invisible Monsters has a unique story that lets you see the world through someone else’s eyes – In this case, the eyes of a former beauty queen who had the lower half of her face shot off.
Yes, it is actually a book. Yes, you should still read it. It’s very similar to the movie, but with some differences that make it worth reading (and just so you know, S. Morganstern is not a real person, even though Goldman talks like he is. Sorry to ruin your dreams).
16. The Vampire Lestat – Anne Rice
A better option than Interview with the Vampire, this book gives you better insight into the character of Lestat, and lets you love him for who he is, not for how others see him. It’s also far less angsty, and a lot like a memoir.
Graduating generally makes people nostalgic, and this book is a great way to get over that. Basically, Mortified is selected diary entries from people who are grown ups now, but were highly dramatic teenagers in the 70’s, 80’s and 90’s.
Taken from this Doctor Who and the Tardis by Craig Hurle facebook page, this is one of my favorite quotes from Doctor Who ever.
I just wanted to share it with the world. You’re welcome.